I went to Lembah Karmel again on 26-28 November 2010 with my Prayer Groups’ friends. We had Healing Workshop Retreat.
First day, Friday 26 November 2010
We arrived there late. We came right in the worship in the Mass. And they sang ‘Kau yang terindah’ my repentance song. And the Mass was led by Fr. Arsen. It’s very coincidental that I could meet him because he is moving all the time. Now I could see that he is a holy priest. He said every single word in the Mass with love, with all conscience, with all heart. That Mass became wonderful. Though we came late, I couldn’t bear to receive the communion.
After having Mass, we had dinner, and then we continue with a session.
After the session, we had Adoration. Yup the second main course in Lembah Karmel. Jesus poured His love again in Adoration. We worshiped Him with the tongue language and in songs. Fr. Arsen brought the Blessed-Sacrament and walked around the people. The Blessed-Sacrament, Jesus, came in front of me. I truly worshiped Him, adored Him, and enjoyed every second, coz I knew this won’t happen every day. The Blessed-Sacrament moved from me, I bowed down and worshiped, I could feel God’s love is overflowing. I cried. I couldn’t bear how much His love to me. I enjoyed that time. I prayed a lot. I prayed for my family, I really prayed. I also prayed for my friends who asked prayer from me. I prayed for every single name I remembered.
After the Adoration, I met Fr. Arsen, a priest whom I knew from the youth camp, and talked a while. Then my friends and I would like to look for food to eat, but no one sold any food. So, we went back to our room and took rest.
Saturday, 27 November 2010
I woke up at 5 am. It’s not a big deal for me to wake up early every day. So do today, I am happily and freshly woke up at 5. Had bath and called my friends to woke up. Our soul breakfast today was Jesus Prayer (Doa Yesus). I like this prayer a lot but it’s hard to do in Jakarta because it’s too noisy.
It had been long time I don’t do this prayer. It’s hard for me to adapt this silence. I tried. I prayed with all my heart, looked for Jesus. I said in my heart that I believed in the power of His Name. And whoever calls on His Name will have His mercy.
Then we had lunch. After lunch we had sessions. This retreat is a healing workshop retreat. So, we were taught about the meaning of healing, kinds of sicknesses and also how to do a healing prayer. Every Jesus follower was given power to heal. And we could pray for other’s healing with a prayer in Jesus name. But before praying, we should know the cause of the sickness. Is it caused by physical pain or wounded heart. We were given several Bible verses to study and to teach us about the healing. We were also taught the statement we should say in doing a healing prayer. These fun sessions were delivered by CSE brothers.
After all theories we got, we put in practice. We had the healing workshop. We are grouped in 5. We prayed for each other and in turns. Two friends in my group had different length of their left and right hands. We prayed. We saw it with our eyes how the shorter hand grew. This was not the first time for me. So, I took turn to pray for a friend’s hands too.
After the workshop, we had free time to rest. I took bath and an hour nap. Then we continued with Lectio Divina (the Bible Prayer) and then we had the main course: MASS. Fr Joseph, CSE led the Mass. After the Mass, we had dinner. After having dinner, we had Prayer Group and healing prayer. In the healing prayer, everyone could come and get prayed by the brothers and sisters. I was prayed. As usual, I never got resting-in-the-spirit experience. I just prayed a while, then finished. Before we were prayed by the brothers and sisters, we were given time to prepare what we would like to ask from Jesus. Especially, from this retreat, we learnt how to pray and heal people.
I personally asked something. I asked from God to release me from the unworthy feeling, especially the burden from sinning. I could feel the burden of every single sin I made. I am not comfortable with that. I’ve tried to fight that feeling and thought, but it can’t be denied that this feeling is always there. And I also prayed that I may have a new life free of sins, cleared from any attachment with the worldly life, sins and satan. After the Prayer Group and healing prayer, we slept.
Sunday, 28 November 2010
Last morning in Karmel, I didn’t want to wake up late. I woke up at 5:30 coz we got Jesus prayer at 6 o’clock. My friends didn’t wake up when I woke them up. I decided to go alone. My Jesus was waiting, sorry guys… Someone more important was waiting and I couldn’t refuse Him. But at last, some friends came and joined the prayer. I had my Jesus Prayer again. I tried to silence myself again. I realized that my life lately was too noisy. I didn’t have my silence time anymore. The temptation, the nice bed and the music fast beat had stolen the silence of my heart. I got it back in Karmel. And I found happiness in silence.
After the Jesus Prayer, we had breakfast and the last session. It was about faith. And after the talks, we prepared for the Sunday Mass, the first advent Mass in the St. Therese Lisieux Church on the top. We should hike a bit to get there.
The Mass was led by 10 priests: 3 guest-priests from China. And the founding father, Fr. Yo was there to lead the Mass and gave 45 minutes homily (I timed it, today’s homily could be classified not as a long homily). We always had a great Mass at Lembah Karmel. Why? Because all the servants served whole-heartedly and with big love to Jesus. Every word said in the liturgy really said from the deep of their hearts. The songs we lifted up also the songs of our heart. We freely praised Him. We could worship Him moved by the yearning of our own hearts. We could worship Him with the tongue language. We could lift our hands. We could bow down head-to-toes worship. And the most important, they are the servants who are close to Holy Spirit and opened to His guidance. That’s why other people and I love to be there.
The Blessed-Sacrament was walked around the Church to bless everyone. When the Sacrament came near us, we bowed down and worshiped. The time when the Sacrament was near us always made me feel happy. God is very close to us. Jesus truly blessed us. During the Adoration, some brothers and sisters were ready to listen to God’s word and said them as prophecy (nubuat and sabda pengetahuan). Before the Adoration, there was healing prayer too. The Priest got prophecy about some sickness people had there and for those who felt sick could rise up and get healed.
After the Mass, they still gave prayer service. At first I wasn’t too interested. I looked for Fr. Arsen coz I had something to talk with him. I waited a while but I didn’t see him. Then, my friends asked me to join in the prayer again. So I came up and was prayed. I felt very happy and joyful.
Then I met Fr. Arsen. We talked a lil bit. What did we talk about? Hm… Some friends wondered. I made it secret. And I don’t want to share it here too of course. That’s a big secret. Haha. Okay, I give a lil clue. Our chat could be titled: 2015. LOL. It’s very heart-throbbing talk with a happy and holy priest like him. He’s word inspired me and made me kept on reflecting and reflecting. And one more thing, I think I should share coz I’m shock to know this. Fr. Arsen was graduated from UI from the Physics major (FMIPA)! Whow!
Then after lunch, we went back to Jakarta. I promised myself I will come back again to Karmel. And every time I felt down, I will remember the days and blessing I got here, so I could always remember that God is very close to me.
Oh ya, right before we went home, we met Fr. Yohanes. And we took several photos with him. A very rare moments!
This retreat might not show me many manifestation or new feelings in my heart, but I could go home with bigger love to Jesus and renewed relationship with Him.