Camping Rohani 2009
@ Lembah Karmel, Cikanyere
23-28 June 2009
“Aku Berharga Bagi-Mu”
Reflection and testimonial…
Honestly, having my sixth SHDR retreat, a bit made me kinda bored and bigheaded. For having serve the Lord for 2 years in PDKM St. Alfonsus and had become the crew of SHDR and CLL retreats, becoming the participant in this retreat? Hm… I really wanna stand in front and lead the praises and worships along this retreat! However, the crew may only the KTM’s members… a bit sad…
I came with my target to the Lord: I need clarity about my calling.
I went there with my 3 friends: Okta, Hanny and Elle. I was rejected by 30 friends whom I asked. I tried to introduce this retreat to as much as friends long time ago. So, 3 people with success stories might be much better than 30 people with nothing. Thanks to the Lord!
In the first night, we did ADORATION, worship the Blessed Sacrament. I felt the praises and worships were just usual. I was a bit afraid and frightened about the atmosphere around. Then, a Brother said a prophecy about a girl who did abortion. Then, not long time after that, I got a word: virginity. I don’t know why, but I think God really wanna work in this retreat to heal the 530 participants.
Second night TAIZE ADORATION, gr8! I was touched by the Lord, I was hugged by the Lord. I bowed down worship Him. I put my head on the floor. I truly felt very sad but also relief. I bowed down and seemed wanna put my head as low as can be, bowed down in front of God. While bowing down, I spontaneously kept saying ‘Rabi, Rabi…’ and other words I don’t understand and the tongue language.
And then, I also offer myself to be the leader in my group. Because I was thinking, I can’t be the crew, well, I’ll serve inside. However, I’m the oldest in my group! Wew. Then, our group, won the games and outbound! Each of us got a notes book. Hehe.
Huah! In this retreat I really sleep very little, therefore, it’s hard for me to concentrate to the prayer. I was succeeded in the first Doa Yesus, but I felt nothing in the second Doa Yesus! Graor! Brother Pio gave talk and led this prayer.
And then, I’m truly happy and blessed since the blue name-tagged got the subjects about THEOLOGY OF THE BODY! Yey! Before retreat, I tried to read some articles about this, and then I don’t understand, so heavy. But Brother Albert told us very clear, I understand and I like the topic about TOB! Very very interesting! TOB made me know about my own body, about God’s Plan in human body, what human body is for, and the most important, I got a deep explanation about the verse: love others as you love yourself. We had to do that because ‘other is my I there’ or ‘sesama adalah aku yang disana’. And the opposite of LOVE is LUST. Lawan dari cinta adalah memanfaatkan.
Oh ya, in one of Brother Albert’s session, he asked a question to us: apa potensi manusia untuk menjadi kudus. Several friends answered, but no one right until I raised my hand and answer him with my deep basic perception about HOLYNESS: WE ARE CREATED IN THE IMAGE OF GOD; MEANWHILE GOD HIMSELF IS HOLY, SO sudah pada hakikinya setiap manusia itu kudus dan setiap manusia MEMILIKI PANGGILAN AGUNG sebagai seorang kudus. It’s not extreme; it’s our basic calling to be saint! That’s my perception which God told me through daily Bible Readings which I hold, and then the Brother also said like that: I’m confirmed; strengthen!
And also a session about ‘marriage or celibacy?’ hm… I felt stomachache.
A session about LB –luka batin-
“Saya memang tidak merasakan angin ribut, seperti yang dialami pada hari Pentakosta pertama, tetapi saya mengalami angin sepoi-sepoi basa seperti yang dialami oleh Nabi Elia di Gunung Horeb…” as quoted by St. Therese Lisieux, which means: I was just happy. Thanks the Lord!
I cried. Healed. Renewed. Glory and praises to the Lord!
Kinda graor. I washed a dad figure but, you know what, I think the figure was foreigner, so he couldn’t understand what I said and he even didn’t talk a word! And he didn’t wash me back! Graor! Panitia payah!
One of the days there, we had a Mass which led by Father Arsenius Viccar, CSE. He talked about friendship. Wanna relate God’s friendship to human as human-between friendships, so he asked a couple of friend my come in front. Then, Elle pulled me, I was shy… but then, we went in front. Huahuahua! In front of 530 participants+crews+Brothers and Sisters= EXIST! Everybody may know us! Kinda cool… lolz…
I also like the Mary Mass: again! Especially in the communion, while Brother Stefanus sang: Ave Maria Gratia Plena…. Aaaw….. I felt a deep communion to Jesus inside Mary. Her virginity and she delivered Jesus to this world, she must be the closest human ever to Jesus and I found romantics communion to Jesus in Mother Mary.
Hm… I did as I did last year to be prayed… I went in front… I pray for clarity about my calling to God… one of my target in this retreat is to ask clarity from GOD. And the answer is: walk your life, u’re still too young. Wait until 4-5 years again, ok! Clarity found in processes.
Brothers and Sisters
Not just me, my friends also said that there’s a sister who really looks like my Santa Ursula’s headmaster: Sr. Moekti, well the Carmel Sister name is Sr. Rufina, but we called her: Sr. Moekti before knowing her name… ahaha…
In a spot near the canteen room, there’s a CSE stand which there where a poster about CSE’s clothes. We read the poster, pointing their slipper called: KASUT KERELAAN MEMBERITAKAN DAMAI & SEJAHTERA. But you know what, what the Brothers wear: SWALLOW slipper… hahahahahahaha! Means: KASUT KERELAAN MEMBERITAKAN DAMAI & SEJAHTERA = SWALLOW. Gubrakzzz.. ahaha.lolz… then, we called the handsome Brother: frater swallow, since we didn’t know his name.
Oh ya, after the retreat, we took some pictures with those Carmelite. As the effect of our EXISTANCE, I mean our madness which attracted many people around, a Brother talked to us and told us that he was happy saw me went in front in the calling mass, which reminded him to his friend in China. And you know what, he is from CHINA!!! He talked Indonesian not fluently. And then we talked Chinese to him. He said that the youth in China was still in darkness, drugs and drunk. He came from China as Father Yohanes had a mission in China too. I was really blessed to meet him and to listen to him when he told us that time. I was touch and keep thinking about China.
well, thanks to the Lord that He lead me to join this retreat again. thanks Lord, for those wonderful days, i really love being there. mon loves Carmel.